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Saturday, 20 September 2008

Boxes full of me

I have noticed that most people like to put me in a box. The boxes may be labelled any (but never all) of the following:

1. Quiet
2. Creative
3. Restrained
4. Book worm
5. Loud
6. Mad/ crazy
7. Bizarre
8. Fun
9. Studious
10. Awkward/ clumsy

I just read an article by Shobha Narayan, and she was talking about her character, or lack thereof...
Basically, she related an incident where she got into a screaming fit with her brother, and her mother told her that only those people who take the 'higher road' (read: offer the other cheek) in a fight have character.

This is pigeonholing. The columnist's mum has straitjacketed all the world's character into a tiny little space, and the poor thing cannot even protest. I ask you, is this fair?

I have screaming fits too, and they're also aimed at my brother. He's the only one who can motivate me into shrieking utter rubbish, and throwing things at him. Ms. Narayan said she resisted throwing a plate at her brother because it was made of stainless steel, and would therefore not shatter into a million pieces. I would have thrown the steel plate. I would probably have thrown a hammer at my brother, if one were available, and if I could have managed to lift it. When I get furious enough, it's better if he just backs up against a wall, cowering under whatever pathetic attempt at armour he has have managed to conjure up. I will throw things, and I have very good aim.

With Close friends, I tend to be more patient. I don't really know why, but yeah, that's how it is. Perhaps because it's a rather rare occurrence that I lose my cool with these blessed individuals anyway- I think it has a lot to do with how they know every damn thing about me, that if they ever did stoop down to my level, they would have lots of material for blackmail. They also know how to calm me down. Others (acquaintances/ people I don't know/ other random people)? They're really not important enough for me to loose my breath over. You screwed up. You can go to hell. Or not. Just don't bother me again for the next week or so.

When I was in seventh grade, I got so irate that I blacked out. This happened twice. I was... thirteen.

So, yeah. I have anger issues.

Does that mean I'm lacking in character?

I crave solitude, stillness.

I love those long peaceful walks when it's warm and sunny but not scorching hot, and the trees all seem to have a story to tell, if only I could just learn their language.

The equanimity of a thunderstorm.

I like to think, and I have an over zealous imagination.

I love reading. Books are my secret hideout. The place I run to, and I believe the only place I will ever truly find complete acceptance. I also love the whole super- hero- going- on- a- quest- to- save- the- world thing. Or even the not- so- super- hero- going- on- a- quest- to- save- the- world thing. Although, those are not the only kinds I enjoy.

I like- no, I LOVE shopping. I don't mind eating either, though it is kind of repetitive.

I'm a responsible citizen- I registered myself as a voter. I don't throw stuff on the streets. I reported the irresponsible security arrangements at one of the Metro stations.

I like my planet, too. I know what the Kyoto Protocol is, and I try to diminish my carbon footprint.

I tend to be critical. Judgemental. I'm also one of the most compassionate people I know.

I can NEVER concentrate unless my exam is the next day.

I like making friends, and I like keeping them, but I also know when it's over- and I can let go.

I love colours. Really. I also think that everyone should know something about foreign relations, and most things about the politics of their country.

I'm a hopeless romantic, and I do believe in love. I think it's real- though just because love is real, doesn’t mean that it is common. It is a rare phenomenon, something that happens to a handful of lucky people who deserve it. I just don't believe I am one of those people.

I think Marriage is a bit of a sham. I feel it is defunct. If the reason is happiness, it doesn't serve the purpose anymore. If the reason is to procreate, it never really did serve the purpose- after all, matrimony is hardly the reason behind kids. The reason, to me, seems to be biology.

I like blogging too, and I enjoy facebook. I like talking.

I love to find out. Ask questions, you know. At school I was often called a 'question bank'.

Really, there are a thousand other things I do. A million different reasons I am. How can these people just put me into one of their mental 'boxes'. That's not what I am- that not all I am.

So... I'd kind of rather lag behind a bit on the character aspect, than miss out on all this.

Oh, and I just found out today, while typing this out- the Blogger spell check does not know how to spell 'doesn't'

Ha!

14 comments:

  1. i am 28 and i still feel that way!..i'm supposed to be mature about it..!!If u ask me maturity is another box!:)...live on!:).

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  2. yup.. get ur point abt people putting u in boxes.. i hate in when people just assume that ur a nerd or a bookworm even when they haven't known u for more than 10 seconds!

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  3. Exactly! It's so annoying, and sometimes, when you do something that they thing corresponds to the box they've put you in soon after you've met them, you just cannot EVER live it down!
    I mean seriously!

    I get it so often- just because I listen to Hindi music, does it really mean I cannot like hard rock?

    Just a question, really.

    And if you do something 'out of character'- it's as if you've let them down or something!

    Freaks.

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  4. Hey, first of all were you supposed to be preparing for CAT besides the tests and exams? Or is it all over? “I can NEVER concentrate unless my exam is the next day.” Ooom, the answer lies there…

    Anyway, nice to see you back and as usual with a superb post. Superb as in S-U-P-E-R-B. And the part you describe the fight with your brother…Oh man, read it with bated breath. (Please please don’t throw hammer or such things to him, even if it’s handy) It brought back memories of my occasional fights with my sister. (Now happily married with two equally or more mischievous kids, thank God, see the rivalry still refuses to die .ha ha ha) And the problem with you gals is that you don’t show any mercy at all when you are angry, you just throw, hit, kick or bite wherever you can and our only advantage is your long hair. (Poor boys they received their ‘share’ from you and later from parents) Nice post man and I immensely like almost all the things about you, from having anger problems to doing your bit to reduce your carbon footprint.

    About ‘the second campaign’: Thanks a lot. Any idea how to register a website? But I don’t think that I would ever launch such a website. It’s such a daunting task. When you say ‘anythingandeverything.com’ you are obligated to have it all in the website huh? All the information, data…more than that is in wikipedia. Yup, my art partner is a real enthu and your comments have made him pretty happy. Another ‘thank you’ from him.

    Yes, that’s the apt phrase ‘out-of-the-body-experience’. Years ago one of my friends met with an accident and spent almost a month comatose. He survived thanks to the tireless efforts by the doctors, staff and prayers of his family and friends. 30 days were snatched away from him, what he might’ve felt? Comparing with that my 2hours lose is nothing, in fact there’s no comparison at all huh?

    Have a great time. Once again all the very best for your exams.

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  5. :D
    Hi Arun :)
    Thanks for the compliments about the post : (see, I can't stop smiling)

    Yeah, my exams start tomorrow, and look what I'm doing... Well, I couldn't stay away, you see, I just kept thinking about how long it's been and stuff, so I just sat down and typed that out.

    Hahaha your fights were like this as well? Oh, well... shows that I'm not that abnormal, altough, I'd have to say that I know of many girls who don't lose it as bad as I do, so I don't know if it's a girl thing only.

    Thanks for liking almost every thing about me! :) (see, smiling again)

    About the website, you'll have to put it online, once you create it... buy server space and other such formalities, but first yu'll have to write the website, obviously. You can probably hire people to do it.
    Also, it may be a daunting task, but, really, what isn't? It's a fabulous money- spinner, and you can make it a community thing- you know like wiki, where everyone can put info.
    I'm sure once it's started, it wont be a problem to continue it, so it's just about setting the ball rolling.

    Your art partner is welcome, and he thoroughly deserves the compliments... really, you guys should do something together. If you start, the rest of us will chip in if you want us to, feeding info n stuff.

    30 days... wow, I'm glad your friend recovered... My best to him.

    Thanks for the good wishes :)

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  6. It's doesn't. What's wrong with that? :s

    Now, back to saving the world...
    :D

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  7. " Oh, and I just found out today, while typing this out- the Blogger spell check does not know how to spell 'doesn't' "


    See? :P

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  8. I do wonder, are 'Jerry' and 'Gerald' the same person?

    And. yes, I do see...

    Oh, shit, I started a sentence with 'and'.

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  9. Yes we are.
    Muahahahahaaha!

    ... Just my "official" account.

    ReplyDelete